[Edited Chapters] Self-positive When I was Sad

December 6, 2016

Assalammualaikum... Friendly reminder, this post was written for a GA that I joined but since I guess it's part of life, I edited it into a normal post.. ^^

Before TESL, I used to be in the relationship with accounting.. It was my father's dream to see me holding a scroll in ACCA and he felt that it was the best career for me.. I gave it a try but end up crying as it was a huge burden for me.. I failed some test miserably and my father kept pushing me by provoking me.. Yes, provocation always works for me as I always tried my best to prove that the statement is wrong but not at that particular moment.. I had to face break up and I lost the person whom had always been my backbone at the same year.. I tried to gain my strength, thinking of my dad but I failed.. 

Thinking of giving up and pursuing my desirable interest, my dad exploded into anger and it was the worst moment.. He treated me like his own enemy, living under the same roof but act like a stranger.. During the broken moment, my ateh became my backbone and supported me to pursue my dreams.. When it was the time for me to leave the house and register myself at college, he didn't want to send me off.. When I grabbed his hands for blessings, he just said, " pergilah.. karang lambat.." and my mom scolded him by saying, " awak hantar anak orang pegi belajar, awak sanggup pegi kelantan la, mana-mana hantar anak buah awak sambung belajar tapi anak bongsu awak sendiri awak buat macam ni.." 

Hearing that, I cried and it didn't change anything..My mom and ateh helped me on that day and before they left, they said " Duduk sini elok-elok, ingat kenapa kau dekat sini.. Buktikan kat papa yang this is the right thing to do..  "

As the time past by, after getting my first result, Alhamdulillah my dad is back to my arm.. It was awkward for us during the first semester but after I proved to him that I'm serious with this new life, he finally gave his blessings to me .. In fact, our relationship become better that we used to had before the big argument... From that remarkable moment, each time I'm sad with something, I always told myself, 
" Razanah Anis, kau pernah hadap yang lagi teruk dari ni.. Nothing is worse than losing papa in your arm so tempuh la semua ni demi papa.. Kalau sebelum nie kau boleh kuatkan diri lawan papa, takkan benda kecik pun nak sedih? La Tahzan Innallaha Ma'ana.. Allah always knows the best and every there's always a rainbow after a rain.. So be strong and believe that the best is coming..."
P/s: I have to admit that for now, my dad is the reason of my everything, so everything that I'm doing is only for him.. Only by thinking of him could make me stronger...

2 comments

  1. Assalamualaikum, salam perkenalan.. Jangan bersedih yea, sis.. Mungkin papa awak nak jadikan awak kuat semangat, apa yang berlaku ada hikmahnya yang tersirat.. Best of luck.. saya datang dari GA yang sama...

    http://starlavenderluna.blogspot.my/2016/12/giveaway-5-years-blogging-by-faezah.html

    ReplyDelete
  2. singgah dari segmen yg sama

    http://thezafirahnazri.blogspot.my/2016/12/giveaway-5-years-blogging-by-faezah.html

    ReplyDelete

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